Author: mebeheer

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Whatever you focus on you get more of it! So be commited to focusing on what you do want, instead of what you don’t want! (Dr Robi S.)

Are you in a position where you do not have enough money to cater for your financial expenditure? Does your financial position not allow you to pay for all those small but required extra’s that allow you to enjoying life to the full? Are you having large debts as a result of internet shopping? Is the value of your mortgage topping the value of your house? Are you receiving endless reminders on a daily/weekly/monthly basis? These are serious issues that need to be resolved.

What can I do for you?
With my back ground as Debt Relief Counselor, I can assist you in providing clarity in the chaos of bills, reminder and debts, through actively engaging your largest creditors or to making a plan that will enable you to create a healthy financial situation. Insights and oversight are the two most important instruments to address financial problems. That is why I would love to assist you in creating clarity in your administration, to create insight in your debts and together asses your income and expenditure profile. Do not delay, but allow me to assist you today. Start today with the solution.

Work is an important part of life. Work is not only a way to make money. It also provides levels of satisfaction, social contacts and a change to keep on developing yourself. At least, this is how it should be.
What if this is not the situation? What if you have more work then you can handle within your work week? What if you boss only pays attention to your mistakes? What if you are bullied and harassed by your colleagues? What if you failing to get this promotion you have been after for so long?

What can I do for you?
At that moment it is good to talk to someone about your situation and together establish how best to go about the circumstances and how you might be able to shift your situation.

Apprehension and fear are healthy natural reactions that protect you against danger around you. It can also start from within yourself, for example being afraid to be left alone or to fail in activities you are diligently undertaking, or to disappoint others. These fears are healthy and natural. On the contrary, fear and anxiety can also become very unhealthy. If you experience many of these apprehensive moments it might hamper your quality of life. These fears are neither healthy nor natural. It affects your daily rhythm, your work and your social life, the way to think and feel. It’s often your feeling of embarrassment that is making it very difficult to talk about it and/or your self confidence is rock bottom and you do not have a clue how to stop this.

What can I do for you?
We are jointly going to establish the characteristics of your fears and will together determine the root course(s). Specifically what you are frightened off and how you are showing your anxiety. Collectively we will discuss your experiences, your feelings, behavior and dependant on your circumstances we will discontinue certain practices.

What do you see when you watch in the mirror? Do you see someone that you like, appreciate and trust? Or do you see someone that only makes mistakes, is limited and is full of failures? You are not alone. Many people have difficulty to spot the good things in one self.

How is this possible?
There are various possible root causes: your upbringing, relationships, social issues or (resent) experiences. One thing is for sure, your self-esteem and self-confidence has started to develop at an early age. As a child we learned to ensure we catered for our basic needs: food, cloth and above all love, security and acceptance. When these basic needs were not (sufficiently) catered for, we have adopted ourselves to get what we so badly require.

As a child you do not have the ability of full self-reflection and quickly believe it’s you that is making the mistakes. This translates into feelings of fear, shame and sometimes even guild. You could potentially be carrying these feelings with you for the rest of your life, those that you cannot get ride off.

When you are confronted with a shocking experience, it can turn your life upside down. You could think about a sudden passing away off your father, mother, partner, child, friend or girlfriend, being confronted with a dreadful sickness or physical limitation, a broken marriage, a criminal offence or a traffic accident. These are all impactful occasions that have the potential to significantly shock your life and affect you emotional or physical well being. Fear, anger, shame, guild, lack of understanding can lead to hyperventilation, heart palpitation and abdominal pain. These emotions can very quickly replace each other and can be considered as very intense and razor-sharp and feel like they will never fade away.

How could you pick-up your activities and continue to life?
As professional Grieving Counselor, I know grieving processes are not straightforward. Often we chose to ignore and continue as per usual without giving ourselves the time to ask/acquire support. Hence, I do recommend you to not omit this step. Take your time. One of the ways to do this is to talk about it and create steadiness in your feelings. Take your time to grieve about your loved ones, to adopt your lifestyle to the new situation. I can support you to find a way out of this state of affairs.

“.. and they life happily married there after…”
This is how many fairy-tales end. What is often forgotten about is the “living together” is only just starting and is not always fairy-like. In every relationship there are moments of tension, irritation or quarrel, but you might think that this is more serve in yours: more quarrels, more tension and more problems. Quarrels about raising kids, proper proportion work versus free time, financial expenditure, how to split domestic tasks, about friends, sex, or …. It’s important not to ignore these problems, but to try to resolve them early on.

What can I do for you?
We could mutually establish where it all started, what the foundation was of your relationship, what was good and what did not work out. During this process, I will assist you to rediscover each other again and eventually learn to better understand one another, to start dating, and learn to improve communication. This is a difficult and very personal process, but certainly worth to work it in cooperation with you.